Sunday, October 25, 2015
Halloween Movie Month: Proteus
Proteus is about a group of drug smugglers who board an oil rig after their yacht explodes. Once on the oil rig, they discover that it is a secret base of horrifying experiments.
Proteus is a terrible B-movie and that is made abundantly clear within the first 3 minutes. Terrible acting. Horrible sound mixing. Plot holes. Scenes jump around without segue or explanation. Characters know how to do things without any logical explanation for their knowledge. There are scenes that are obviously rip-offs of other movies (specifically, the mess-hall scene from Alien). Inconsistent physics of when/how people get hurt. Pretty much all of the things that you would expect from a crappy monster B-movie from the mid-90s. The movie is so bad that it is almost funny enough on its own. Almost. But, it is primarily the kind of movie that you need to watch with friends so that you can riff it.
Outside of the ridiculous factor, it's actually not a completely horrible movie. Obviously, there are so many things that make it atrocious. However, at its core, it's a fun little monster movie on a remote island - in this case, the island just happens to be an oil rig. It's just hard to get past all of the faults and truly enjoy it as a good movie. All of that being said, if you can get past some of the initial things that make this movie hard to watch, it starts just being ridiculous in a fun way. One of my favorite lines from the movie: "maybe after you blew it up it crawled into the ventilation system and died." My other favorite line: "you're a f***ing fish with a drug habit!"
Rating and Recommendation: 2/5. Taking everything into account, it actually ended up being a better B-movie, sci-fi, monster flick than what I initially expected. You just have to get past the horrible (horrible) first half. I think that it works best as riffing fodder, but there are times when it is enjoyable in it's own right. Not worth buying. Not especially worth seeking out. But, if you are with friends and one of them suggests you watch it, it won't be the worst decision of your life. Just make sure that they are ok with jokes being made during the movie.
Be sure to check back soon for more reviews in Halloween Movie Month! In the meantime, leave comments on this (or any other) review, follow me here and on twitter (@GargyleReviews), and let me know what movies you'd like for me to review for Halloween Movie Month!
- The Gargyle